Why is it so difficult to understand the other guy? Perhaps these are some of the reasons:
1) Your backgrounds, experiences, and perspectives may be very different. 2) Your own opinions seem beyond question. You believe your sources of information present the truth: religious texts, scientific discoveries, family beliefs, the majority opinion of your acquaintances. 3) Your desire to stay secure, comfortable, and loyal; you don't want to rock your boat, to upset your friends and family, or to distance yourself from social or religious groups. 4) Your fear of losing the benefits of your beliefs. For example, losing the presence of the Perfect Parent teaching, guiding, and protecting you and providing life after death. Or losing hope that medical science will extend your life or that your political party can improve government. 5) Your self confidence inhibits you from imagining you might be wrong. 6) Your prejudice against the other guy and other opinions reinforces the idea that he is wrong and you are right. Only believing those who agree with you adds to your bias. 7) Your focus on perpetuating your own beliefs reduces or eliminates the time and energy you could spend on understanding others. 8) Your dislike of compromise, agreeing to disagree, or acknowledging grey areas. 9) Your self satisfaction in believing you are right and others are wrong.
The other guy may have the same reasons to not understand you. When you can get beyond the obstacles to understanding each other, empathy can develop. Maybe you will change your opinions; maybe you won't. You will improve the definition of your own opinions by including what you believe and what you don't. Understanding the other guy will help you understand yourself.
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