Friday, December 29, 2017

Hindsight

   
     After a decision was made or an action was taken, we may look back in hindsight and realize we may have regrets about the past.  We may wonder, "If I could go back, would I do it differently; should I have done something else?"
     How different our lives might be today, if we had made other decisions.  The past can't be changed, but we can learn from it and possibly make amends.  The past was a different time when equal rights and expectations regarding women were still in their infancy.  Men trusted the corporate world to provide them a ladder up to success.  Relocating away from home seemed like an adventure, but now we may realize the advantages of living close to family.  Or the opposite may be true.  Staying close to home may have limited our potential.
     We may have been careless or insensitive in a relationship.  Apologies may be in order.  We may have neglected to do the right thing and need to make amends.  New discoveries may have allowed us to change our minds about a person or about our opinions on issues.
     Some people think, " If I could do it all over again, I would do the same thing."  Others think they are living out their destiny.   No mater what, we can look back on our lives, learn from possible mistakes, and make amends when advisable.
      When we look back on a year or on a lifetime, opportunity is always available to use our hindsight to improve our future.

Wednesday, December 27, 2017

Hate

   
     An extreme dislike aimed at a variety of targets: a particular person, a certain group or philosophy; a disability, decline in health, pain, and suffering; lack of basic essentials; suppression of human rights; cruelty, violence, crime, abuse of power, plus other behavior judged as evil.
     Many people believe that hate is something we should strive to eliminate from our emotions and actions because it isn't nice or proper to feel this way.  Often, we deny or even fool ourselves into believing we don't have this "embarrassing" emotion.  Hate seems negative, but it can spur us on toward positive outcomes.
     In infancy, discomfort is felt: too cold, too hot, hunger, thirst, pain, neglect.  Our wails signal others who will help us survive.  Later, fear creeps in as we anticipate something unpleasant, and in some cases, phobias develop.  Anger adds to the mix.
     Self-hate can develop when we are too critical of ourselves or dislike a part of ourselves, a physical attribute, a personality trait or shortcoming, a lack of purpose, guilt over past or present behavior.  Comparing yourself to an ideal or feeling jealousy towards others can lead to low self-esteem and depression.
     Many religions define humans as sinful beings who deserve punishment.  These believers may become judgmental of themselves and others, then feel a need for forgiveness from a supernatural power.  Some think humans are sinful from day one and will always fall short of what they should be.
     Hate can cause harm to yourself and others.  It can upset you emotionally and physically.  The hated and the hater can suffer the consequences.  However, we can recognize and accept hate as a natural and normal emotion and use it to make positive changes in ourselves and the world.
 
   
   

Sunday, December 17, 2017

See Something - Say Something

     Be aware and notice when something or someone doesn't seem right.  Saying something about it may save lives.  That's exactly what author Angie Thomas does in her novel "The Hate U Give."  As a black woman, she sees and understands what isn't right with an American situation that affects us all, then says something, writes a story so well through the eyes of her main character Starr Carter.  Starr also sees a tragedy and must be a witness to the event.  Her family and neighborhood must cope with this tragedy and it's aftermath.
     This novel shows the culture, language, and behavior of blacks and whites alike.  Hate breeds hate; fear breeds fear.  We need to see and understand when something isn't right and try to correct it.      

Thursday, December 14, 2017

Suspend Disbelief

   
     Superheroes with superpowers can take us away into a fantasy world.  Our imagination can cause us to believe temporarily something beyond reason and logic; we suspend our disbelief.  Fiction and film use many techniques to draw us into the story.
     Mythology of the Greeks, Romans, and other cultures have given us many characters and stories which provided an explanation of the mysteries of life.  We can still enjoy those myths of the past and also get transported through special effects into a fantastic universe of the future.
     Suspension of disbelief can allow us to be entertained by unrealistic characters and situations; however, turning off logic long-term can cause us to believe that which is untrue.  The supernatural, magical, and miraculous seem possible.  Understanding the natural world is complex enough, that adding supernatural elements creates confusion and conflict.
     Throughout your life, make sure the hero you admire is real and be content with natural powers.  Suspend your disbelief to enjoy a tale of fantasy, but keep the logic turned on in real life.
   

Friday, December 8, 2017

A New Day

 
      Every day is new but can be overshadowed with yesterdays and tomorrows.  Comparing the present to what we remember in the past and to what we imagine will be in the future is a natural and automatic activity which can be a help or a hindrance.
     Each breath of air we take is a step into a new day.  It may be an improvement after a stale,  unpleasant breath, a time to anticipate a better future, or it could be the best air we will ever breathe.  We should appreciate and optimize the present, inhale the positive and exhale the negative.
     The past has value and has led us to the present which leads us to the future, but the here and now is the most valuable time of all.  When we place more value on the past, wish for the good old days, and resist change, our life can become stale.  When we put our hopes onto the future, we can miss the value of today.   By putting too much confidence in what happened in the past, what was written about the past, what may have relevance only in the past, we can overshadow the new: scientific discoveries, evolution of ideas, and logical thinking.  By believing the best is yet to come, we may miss the beauty of right now.
     Seize the day, see what's happening now, try to understand yourself and the world around you.  Breathe in the fresh air of a new day.

Friday, December 1, 2017

Keeping Up

   
     Even with good time management, we have trouble keeping up.  Jobs, chores, school work, family obligations are on our to-do list which gets even longer as other tasks are added.
     Some items on our list are truly essential; others can be eliminated.  We can delegate some items and place them on someone else's list.  Realize why your list seems so long.  Influences from family members, tradition, and advertising can unfairly contribute to our obligations.
      Keeping up with the Joneses is an expression that reveals we may make decisions based on what our neighbors, friends, and family are doing.  Some people would rather feel accepted as part of the crowd than be individuals.  They allow others to set the standards, then perpetuate the activities.
     At Christmas time, we can get stressed and even frantic trying to decorate, celebrate, buy gifts, send cards and letters, attend services, give and attend parties, some activities enjoyable, some not so much.   Other holidays and birthdays can have the same effect.  We seem to buy our way through special days whether the money and time are well spent or not.
     Decide for yourself what you want to do and keep those doors open.  Decide what you don't want to do and close the door on those activities.  Realize the Joneses don't always know what's best.   

Saturday, November 18, 2017

Armed

   
     Feeling safe and protected eases stress in a dangerous world.  A newborn loves to be swaddled in a warm blanket or held close in someone's arms.  We all love hugs, a warm smile, or an arm around our shoulder, knowing that the person near us is friendly and safe.  We also feel safer having military abroad and police nearby.
     We can protect ourselves with healthy lifestyles, vaccinations, proper diet, sunscreen, protective gear especially in dangerous occupations and contact sports, by wearing seat belts and driving cautiously, locking our doors and setting alarms to warn us of intruders and fire.  We also need to heed advice concerning dangerous weather and insist that our environment is safe and protected.
    As we grow more aware of danger in the world, all of this may not seem enough.  By avoiding risky situations, we try to distance ourselves from danger.  By learning methods of self defense and becoming physically strong, we can prepare for personal attack.  Some people feel the need to own and carry a weapon.  Hopefully, these gun owners have been screened and are of sound mind and disposition and only have access to appropriate weapons.  Unfortunately, these guns can be grabbed and turned against us, stolen by thieves, or found by children with dire consequences.
     Other forms of armor are often employed to give a sense of safety and protection.  Guard dogs and personal bodyguards are used.  Some people seek a spiritual source which provides a sense of parental protection.  Others believe this is just a placebo.  We and our government should try to make friends instead of enemies, approach conflict with diplomacy, and make everyone feel safe and protected.
     No matter what techniques we employ, we have to accept our own vulnerability but not let fear overwhelm us from getting on with life.  We must safely and effectively arm ourselves.

Sunday, November 12, 2017

What we don't want to admit

   
     In the short term, we can have an effect on human history, all of us within our families, some of  us over many generations, and a very special few of us over many centuries.  Our decisions and actions, which hopefully are evolving, can have a small part in the development of civilization.
     In the long term, we are a grain of sand in the universe, a drop of water in the ocean, a second in time.  Our short lifetime ends and our bodies return to the earth.
     We can add to history by reproducing and raising a new generation and by improving the lives of others through science, philosophy, and art.  We bloom, flower, and give to the world.  We have a short lifetime to make a difference.
     What we don't want to admit is that we are a minute speck in time and space.   We may feel special and others may consider us special, but don't fall into false beliefs that elevate us beyond the truth.  We need to use our time and talents to add what we can to humanity, then find contentment in having a life well-lived.
     What we don't want to admit is we don't have all the answers, but we shouldn't make up answers that keep us from seeing reality.  You have one life to live so make the most of it.

Monday, November 6, 2017

Offense and Defense

   
    In football, most players concentrate either on the offense or on the defense, while we must live our lives having both skill sets.  Everyone needs to prepare their bodies and minds to get the utmost out of life.  We need to get advice from experts and practice. Cooperation and teamwork are also essential for success.
     As we set goals, we need to break them down into manageable steps.  Along with proper timing, patience, and perseverance, we need to be aggressive in attacking our problems.  We need to anticipate obstacles and deal with them and focus on moving forward.  Take charge of your life.  Be on the offense.
     Sometimes, we need to hold our ground and resist those who do not have our best interests at heart.  We need to remain strong and able to protect ourselves.  We must tackle our problems to make sure we aren't delayed in accomplishing our tasks.  Stand up for what you believe in.  Be on the defense.
     Whether you are on a team or participate alone against one competitor, you must have offensive and defensive skills.  Do what it takes to reach your goals.
 
   
     

Wednesday, November 1, 2017

Home of the Brave

   
     We all can be brave.  Most often, we give this label to the military and law enforcement who risk their lives fighting enemies at home and abroad.  These courageous individuals are prepared to defend our citizens and attack our enemies with the strongest forces available often in very dangerous and life-threatening situations.  Other equally brave individuals often are not recognized or given the praise and honor they deserve.
     Consider these brave Americans: young mothers who give their bodies to the development and birth of new lives and do everything in their power to defend and protect their offspring; courageous individuals who face the physical adversities of serious injuries, diseases, surgeries, and rehab while enduring pain and suffering; surgeons and other health professionals who spend their lives saving lives; scientists who discover and create ways to improve health and the environment; educators who devote their lives to seeing that students reach their potential and live productive lives; undercover agents who face danger while discovering info to prevent violence; diplomats who attempt to reduce tensions, build international relationships, and promote peace; elected representatives who defend democracy and ensure all citizens are treated fairly; brave citizens who express their opinions even when others disagree.
     Being brave requires preparation to take on difficult tasks and perseverance to continue which may require giving up comfort and security.  Some people are trained to defeat the enemy by taking lives when necessary; others focus on saving lives.  Both groups are equally brave.  All citizens need to live courageous lives to keep America the home of the brave.

Thursday, October 19, 2017

Brain Power

   
     So sad to witness a loved one gradually losing mental functions.  The person begins to feel trapped in a prison, no longer able to come and go as before, needing a companion to prevent getting lost, losing the privilege of driving a car.  The mind puts up other barriers of memory loss, confusion, disorientation in time and place, losing the ability to concentrate on reading or watching a TV show or movie, becoming uninterested or unable to understand current events, a decreased ability to communicate, and slowly forgetting the identity of loved ones.  Some brains become so impaired the person begins to lose physical abilities.
     Also sad to see mentally healthy people give up some of their brain power voluntarily or under the influence of well-meaning or self-serving individuals.  A person may limit what they read or listen to and become only interested in preconceived beliefs.  They may become uninterested in other points of view or believe others are wrong and choose to only socialize with those that are like-minded.  They may fear the consequences of changing their minds.
    As long as you have the ability to think, explore, question, evaluate, and learn, don't limit yourself by just residing in your own little world.  Don't imprison your mind with self-imposed barriers.   Use all of your brain power.
     

Sunday, October 15, 2017

Justice

   
     In the animal kingdom, justice is a foreign concept.  Instead, survival of the fittest is the dominant law.  An animal has to be physically and mentally fit, able to find nourishment and shelter, protect itself, adapt, and evolve.
     Much of an animal's behavior originates from genetic makeup and inborn instincts, then it learns from parents and peers and through trial and error.  As animals group together, some become leaders and others followers.  Those in power set the rules and attach consequences of rewards and punishments.  Group survival is paramount.
     In recent history, humans have added value to the individual and profess that all should be able to survive.  The strongest should not abuse their position at the expense of the weak.  Of course, this is still just an ideal.  Governments were formed with varying ideas of who should be more powerful, usually the males of the majority who used their position to hold on to leadership.  Laws were made that sounded good, but at a closer look did not promote equality.  Many groups of people had to fight for equal rights and justice.  Laws then needed to be changed.
     Some people believe if we work hard, we will get what we deserve, and that those who are poor must not be working hard enough.  If only justice could be this simple.  In fact, justice is very rare.  Consider those who are victims of birth defects, disease, poverty, poor parenting, natural and man-made disasters.  All  of these circumstances are  beyond their control and are not fair.
     This is when the group must realize that their strength can only be sustained when justice prevails in the lives of all, when no one lacks food, shelter, education, or health care, when everyone is treated equally by the law.  Many people feel our government does not do enough to insure true equality and justice.  When they feel pressured to behave as though all is well, to be good little boys and girls, they feel an obligation to be loyal to those who are not treated equally, who do not feel justice.
     We are part of the animal kingdom after all but should elevate ourselves to see to it that all survive and prosper, not just those who are born to privilege and obtain power.  Justice for all!

Friday, October 6, 2017

Afraid to go there

 
      Fear can cause avoidance and denial.  Satisfaction with the status quo can impede inquiry, evaluation, and progress.  When our minds are made up, when we are certain we are right, when we don't try to understand other opinions, our ideas can stagnate.
     Often, we don't analyze our past decisions and behaviors.  We don't want to consider that we may have been wrong or have made mistakes.  Going there may shake our faith in ourselves.
     Often, we honor the opinions of those people who have formed our thinking and those who agree with us.  We don't want to doubt the "experts" in our family, our society, our politics, and our religion.  Going there can seem disloyal, can rock the boat, and perhaps endanger relationships.
     Often, we don't bring up certain topics with certain people because hurt feelings or arguments may result.  Going there may be uncomfortable and seemingly not worth the risk.
     Often, we honor the past more than the present and future.   We want to return to the good old days or to a person who we think will make us great again.  Going there may create fear of the future or lack of confidence in fresh ideas.
     Often, we choose security over taking a risk.  We don't want our family or children to be denied a happy future.  Practicality may overshadow development and progress.  Going there may actually impede fulfilling our dreams.
     Many people use fear to cloud our thinking.  They imply that something worse will lie ahead if  we question their dogma or philosophy.  Tradition has value, but so does innovation.  The future can be better than the past; the sweetest fruit may lie ahead.  Don't be afraid to go there.
 
     

Tuesday, September 26, 2017

Land of the Free

 
     "Oh say does that star-spangled banner yet wave o're the land of the free and the home of the brave?"  Our national anthem was written after a military victory, but citizens in many walks of life have contributed to sustaining freedom, our own personal freedom and the freedom of others.
      Rituals at the beginning of sporting events and public meetings often include listening to and singing our national anthem with the expected body language or saying the Pledge of Allegiance.  Prayers are often added.  Everyone involved should have the freedom to participate or not.
     We need to think about why these rituals begin these activities.  Perhaps they make us all feel like a unified group living in a free country.  After we honor country and God, we can get on with business or play; however, forced patriotism and religion does not connote freedom.
      Freedoms are unlimited as long as they're legal.  We need to question why some people get so insulted when others do not toe the line, do not conform to the norm.  We don't want to understand and instead add a negative connotation to the non-traditional behavior.
     We can show respect without being traditional, and respect is a two-way street.  Some people do not feel respected by the majority, by our president, or by law enforcement officers.  Our Pledge states we are one nation "with liberty and justice for all."  Some people feel they haven't received justice.  They are using their freedom to express their opinions.  Making people aware of injustice and trying to improve conditions for everyone is patriotic.
     Before 2009, the NFL entered the field after the national anthem.  Between 2011 and 2015, the Defense Department paid $53 million of taxpayers' money to pro sports for marketing and advertising and to stage patriotic/military displays to boost military recruitment.  Perhaps contact sports train our youth to fight the enemy, to win the battle, to claim the honor of victory.  
     Look to the eagle, a symbol of unlimited freedom.  May we extend this freedom to all.
   
     
   
   

Saturday, September 23, 2017

Give Up

   
     What you want to give up, what you would be willing to give up, what you would be better off giving up, this reveals what you value most.  You may have to give up something in order to get something else.
     Unhealthy physical and emotional habits, unresolved guilt and grudges, and unrealistic expectations are a few things we need to give up in order to become better human beings.  Giving up wasteful spending of time and money and releasing attempts to control what is beyond our control will create more resources to use for what is really important.  Judging what we can do without makes us realize what is essential.
     No matter how well we plan, we may be forced to give up things we don't want to.  Natural disasters force people to lose their homes and possessions.   As we age, our health, our time, and our energy will decline.  Sickness and death of family members and friends take their toll; our memories become our comfort.  We can learn to do without many things, appreciate what's left, and create something new.  Let go of what needs to go.  Face each challenge and don't give up on yourself.

Monday, September 18, 2017

Non-traditional

   
     Traditions have their advantages: predictable, nostalgic, comfortable, and safe while honoring the past, family, and ancestors.  The non-traditional also has advantages: originality, progressive, modern, and creative while valuing the present and future.
     We can remember and honor the past without repeating it.  Just because something worked in the  past doesn't mean it should remain the same; improvement should be considered.  Families, societies, and religions often count on rituals to reinforce beliefs and values, to create a shared experience, and to form a group identity.  Imagination and courage to take a risk on something new allows invention.  Our opinions and decisions can be just as valuable or even more valuable than what has been set by others.
     Tradition can decide how we spend our time and money, all because a schedule and calendar has been set.   How we dress, what we eat, and how we celebrate are all influenced by tradition. Commerce then uses our traditions to get us to spend money.
     Have confidence that you can design your own life.  Analyze the past with an open mind and have the courage to be non-traditional.
   
     

Friday, September 15, 2017

Simmer and Boil

   
    
      A pan of water will  remain cool and calm until a source of heat causes it to warm up, simmer, and boil.  Prolonged heat will cause the water to evaporate or boil over.   Image that water is your emotions.
     Remaining calm and contented is a state preferred by many.  Others seem to have a need to live in a state of highs and lows.  They seek out the sentimental and the sensational or get agitated and upset easily.  Some are judgmental and resentful, even hold grudges.  Others seem to bask in getting attention and affection.  Their feelings are of utmost importance.
     If you have been born with an "emotional" personality, if your parents have considered this trait endearing and unchangeable, or if you have been otherwise rewarded for this behavior, you may not have reached emotional maturity.  Some parents encourage emotional expression while others may consider some emotions bad and encourage repression of feelings.
    Whatever type of upbringing we have experienced, we may need to train ourselves to take control of expressing our emotions effectively.  Keeping a cool head is more effective even when circumstances or inner conflict tempt you toward emotional reactions.  Of course, we all need to let off a little steam at times, but try to turn down the heat before you boil over.

Sunday, September 10, 2017

Lessons from a Palm Tree

   
     During the worst hurricanes, the palm tree survives.  We could learn a thing or  two from their characteristics.
     The palm has a super large anchor of short rambling roots spread across the upper layer of soil which creates a wide network.  We might benefit from extending ourselves to the right and left, toward liberal and conservative ideas in order to connect with a  wider area of thought.  This anchor will contain a better understanding of ourselves and others.
     The leaves or fronds of a palm tree are huge with flexible spines.  In nice weather, the fronds spread out and make a canopy.  In strong wind, they fold up with less resistance against the elements.  When fronds snap off, they further reduce resistance, spare the trunk, and grow back within a few months to a year.  We benefit from being flexible instead of rigid.  We can go with the flow and drop superfluous ideas in order to form new ones.
     More lessons come from the coconut palm which completely develops the nut with a hard, water resistant shell that can withstand many traumas.  When it separates from the tree, it drops to the ground or into the ocean where its buoyancy allows it to survive and travel great distances.  We must prepare our little nuts to be independent, handle the difficulties of life, leave home, and often live far away in order to be successful.

Thursday, August 31, 2017

Dwelling Upon

   
   
     Your mind might like to go to a dwelling place where you think, rethink, and overthink particular topics or events, perhaps reminiscing, analyzing, or seeking comfort.  You may have reasons to spend more time thinking about the past, the present, or the future.
     Some people wish to live in the moment, keep the past in its place, and not worry too much about the future.  Others may have strong emotional attachments to the past and either like to relive pleasant memories or have trouble forgetting unpleasant ones.  Some people get stuck on trying to solve problems and delay decision making.  Others worry about the future and things that are out of their control.  They may even seek comfort in unrealistic ideas.
     Unfortunate circumstances may force people to dwell upon solving certain problems to survive or improve their lives.  They may not have the luxury to think about other things until their problems are solved.  Tragedies can monopolize our thinking until we are able to move on to a more balanced life.
    Spending an excessive degree of time on a particular subject can take away time better spent on other more pertinent concerns.  Vary your interests, what you think about, read about, and talk about.  Get beyond your own personal story.  You will become more interesting to yourself and others.  Consider the things you have been dwelling upon.         

Sunday, August 20, 2017

Lifesavers

 
      A lifeguard, a firefighter, a good doctor, or a helpful friend can literally save your life or you may save theirs.  Other times, someone or something may temporarily give you a break from a difficult situation.  A piece of candy or a comfort food can make life a little sweeter.
     Solutions both permanent and temporary can help us continue through life and improve hard times.  Exercising our bodies and minds may put us back on track.  An escape from unpleasant facts can relieve stress and give us the strength to persevere.   Meditation, reading, and writing can calm our busy lives.  Some believe that religion and prayer provide solace.
     Find ways to be a lifesaver for yourself and others.

   

Saturday, August 5, 2017

Recommended

   
     Neil deGrasse Tyson dedicated this small book "To all those who are too busy to read fat books Yet nonetheless seek a conduit to the cosmos."  I recommend this book to anyone who appreciates scientists and their discoveries.
     Two of my favorite Tyson quotes: "We are stardust brought to life." "After the laws of physics, everything else is opinion."  I would also add a Confucius saying: "True wisdom is knowing what  you don't know."  I don't know much about astrophysics but am eager to learn more.   I admire scientists and authors who can relate this information to scientists and non-scientists alike.
     Be informed about scientific realities.  Enjoy this brief but meaningful introduction to astrophysics.  The info will awaken your interest, and the final chapter puts everything into perspective.  
   

Tuesday, August 1, 2017

Saints

   
     In NOLA - a football team, in the Catholic Church - a dead miracle worker, in the Lutheran Church - all Christians, in general -  someone who leads an exemplary life, these are saints.
     We may think someone is a saint when they are a good person, going beyond what many people do, behaving in a way that benefits others.  Some definitions add that a saint is holy.
     Sainthood is a goal for many who seek wisdom from God and then live with Him eternally.  Some  people just try to do their best according to their own judgment.  Many in Louisiana look to their team to do their best.
     Whether you cheer for, pray to, or revere someone who has done their best, realize you can also be a saint.  Whether you are religious or not, just do your best.
   
   

Saturday, July 29, 2017

Conscience

   
     Develop your own and develop your children's conscience, that inner voice that helps us make choices that benefit ourselves and others.  Teach your children why, according to you, some choices are better than others.  Have them learn that other people may have reasons to disagree.  We all should be aware of the variety of choices people make.
     Not because your parents told you so, not because Big Father or Big Brother have handed down the laws and observe your behavior, not because you will be rewarded or punished, but develop a conscience that will promote survival, develop intellect and logic, sustain mental and physical health, plus protect nature.
     A child or adult is responsible for actions and should be aware of possible consequences.   Pleasing others has it's place but shouldn't be the primary reason to do or not to do.   Put the past in its place and train your mind to think, analyze, and define your behavior.  Understand who has made the "rules" and why they were made.  Don't fill your mind with obligations that may not make sense.   Be proud when your children gradually become independent thinkers.  They may not agree with you, but that is their right.  Let their conscience be their guide.

Saturday, July 22, 2017

Lost For Good

   
     Never to be seen again, people, possessions, the past, and ideas leave your life often with feelings of sadness.  We may still miss what was lost, but we can go forward and recover.  We can repeal and replace laws and ideas with improved versions, but often the value of an earlier version will be sadly missed.
     We miss people now gone from our lives, possessions lost, and ideas once held dear.  We sometimes miss the past, our childhood, and other days gone by.  When we revise our ideas, we may miss the benefits of earlier beliefs.   Progress, however, needs to be welcomed.
     Baby teeth need to be lost in order to make space for adult versions.  This can also be said about  beliefs formed in childhood that need to make way for well-thought-out ideas of adulthood.  The past must not hinder the present.
     Some losses are beyond our control.  Some losses will always be missed.  Other losses may be necessary in order to improve.  Lost for good can mean lost forever or lost for our benefit.
     
   
   

Sunday, July 16, 2017

Sensational

   
     Whatever gets your emotions going, whatever takes you away from the ordinary or humdrum, these topics grab your attention and can affect your behavior.  You may need to be more careful about what you listen to, talk about, watch and read about because some topics may distort your thinking.
     The news media presents sensational stories beginning with crime, violence, natural and man-made disasters, life-threatening or death-causing events, then goes on to politics or celebrity tidbits, and ends with cute, feel-good trivia.  Social media is full of kids, pets, political and religious opinions, the heart-warming or heart-breaking, full of emotional content.  Facebook readers can respond with like, love, ha ha, wow, sad, or angry emojis.  Popular movies often contain violence and crime or romance and sex, anything emotional and beyond reason.
     We are bombarded with the sensational; we seldom are encouraged to think logically.  We may be shocked or entertained temporarily and even share these emotional topics with others, but we should think about why we are so fascinated.  Some experts say that our brains evolved in a hunter-gatherer environment where anything novel or dramatic had to be attended to immediately for survival.  We still may be using our primitive brains and become thrill-seekers.
     Emotions are essential for human development, but they shouldn't take over our logical thinking.  An overwhelming desire for emotional highs and lows can inhibit the necessity of dwelling in reality. Outside influences can stimulate us to irrational opinions and behaviors.   We may occasionally need a respite from our day-to-day lives, a need to lighten our load, but be wary of spending too much time and energy on the sensational.

               

Saturday, July 8, 2017

Enough

   
     When we realize we have enough, when we help others have enough, we can reach a state of satisfaction.  We may need more to stay healthy, to reach our potential, to complete necessary goals, but we also need to realize when enough of something is enough.
     We may or may not have gotten what we needed in the past.  Something might not have seemed enough.  Hopefully, we can learn how to provide for ourselves now and in the future.  Sometimes, we have too much of a good thing and need to cut back.  Sometimes, we indulge in the detrimental.
     We need to face reality instead of creating fantasy.  Down through history, humans have had trouble understanding reality and have been uncomfortable with the unknown.  Even though they were the most evolved of all creatures, they considered themselves above it all.  Their intelligence allowed them to discover new things and solve problems.  Their imagination often created ideas to explain the unknown.  They passed down what they learned and ideas they created, some truth and some fantasy.
     Some people are not satisfied with being a part of nature.  They want to have answers to the mysteries.  They feel more comfortable with someone or something guiding and protecting them.  They want more than what nature provides and what they can provide for themselves.  When you take the responsibility of caring for yourself plus helping others when needed, feel satisfaction.  Enjoy your life but don't expect the impossible.  Know the difference between reality and fantasy.  Appreciate nature and know when enough is enough.
     You can follow the sentiment in the illustration, but add this: Where you are right now may be enough for now, but keep on striving for clarity and improvement.
         
   
   

Tuesday, July 4, 2017

Independent

   
     Our country decided to become independent, knowing that it did not need another to rule over us.   We had the self-confidence, courage, and responsibility to take care of ourselves with freedom and a democracy to create and uphold our laws.  Elected representatives can amend, change, and add to these laws.  As long as citizens are law-abiding, they can think, speak, and live as they see fit.
     Individuals can stay completely independent or join groups who encourage members to agree with their way of thinking, adding their own code of behavior.  Some groups are religious, some political.  As long as these groups uphold the laws of the land, as long as they allow others to have equal rights, they can promote their philosophies.
     Family members should encourage their youth to prepare themselves to be independent in thought, word, and deed.   Young adults should strive to be financially independent, emotionally strong, and able to think and make their own decisions.
     As a country, as individuals, and as family members, we should encourage freedom.  Celebrate independence every day of your life.

     

Thursday, June 29, 2017

Obsolete

   
     Our bodies grow old, but our thoughts should stay up-to-date.  This may require an open and inquisitive mind that can delete the out-of-date and refresh beliefs and opinions.  Many people want to cling to the ideas of their parents and ancestors.  New ideas seem to interfere with age-old concepts.  Scientific evidence can collide with past notions.
     Some ideas from the past are still valid, but many are faulty and obsolete.  We need to clean out our closets, keep what is essential and toss out the rest.   Some items may have historical and sentimental value, but some things are just worn out and need to go.  Easier to clean a closet than a mind.
     Just because something is new doesn't make it true or false, helpful or trivial.  The same goes for something old.  Allow your mind to go forward, grow, and improve.  Don't become obsolete.

Wednesday, June 21, 2017

Speak Up

   
     When you can make a difference, when the time is right, when you might regret it if you don't say something, speak up.  Be courageous, yet courteous; have good intentions, but be prepared for criticism.  Show others that you welcome their contributions and encourage them to speak up.
     Value your own opinions and the opinions of others.   If you want to influence others, be willing to let them influence you or at least, make you think.  Listen, speak, then listen again.  Add to the dialog with respect.  Insults and name calling are counterproductive.
     We see instances of poor communication every day.  People who are overconfident in their  own opinions cause more division instead of possible compromise.  Thoughtless and hateful remarks are akin to bullying, intimidating others to acquiesce.  Freedom of speech should encourage communication and help clarify the truth.
     Compliment or critique, encourage or caution, support or correct, defend or oppose.  Decide when it is best to speak up.
 

Tuesday, June 20, 2017

Keep Quiet

   
     Or the less politically correct - Shut Up!  Saying this to yourself is an attempt to restrain from making remarks that may be counterproductive, misunderstood, or hurtful, but sometimes frustration and anger are hard to contain.  Trying to silence someone else can also reflect your own frustration and anger.
     Sometimes, we just need to release our feelings and opinions and share our thoughts, free speech and all that, but be aware of the possible consequences.  Sometimes your ideas are not welcomed, are considered none of your business, and believed to be overstepping.  Parents of adult children often have to hold their tongue out of respect.  Friendships need to be protected, so we should take care that remarks are not insulting.
     Many people don't want their opinions questioned or are only interested in opinions agreeing with their own.  In the past, we were told never to discuss religion or politics in polite company, for obvious reasons.   Better to just have a pleasant evening.  Weigh the risks of opening up your mouth or writing down your thoughts.
     When you feel like telling someone else to "keep quiet," try to understand the reasons behind their remarks.  Don't stop communication, but try to present your own objections in a civilized tone, and explain your own opinions.
   Quieting yourself or expecting others to be quiet may help keep the peace, but the price of silence may be too high.  Decide when it is best to keep quiet.
 

Monday, May 22, 2017

Winnowing

   
     Using the wind or a current of air to remove the chaff from the wheat can be a metaphor for removing the bad  from the good.  Sometimes we need to allow a cleansing air blow through our minds to remove the worthless from the valuable.
     We must recognize the chaff in our minds, that which is unhealthy, nonproductive, untrue, and bad for us, that which is holding us back from our potential and narrowing our view of life.  Perhaps something or someone in our past is still surrounding our thinking, preventing us from recognizing the wheat, the seed of truth which we need for sustenance and growth.  Perhaps we are holding on to a protective covering for comfort, not wanting to face facts.  We may be holding on to a philosophy or a relationship that needs to be improved or dismissed.
     We need to keep the good, that which is healthy, those grains that help us survive, take root in reality and blossom.  Find a wind of fresh air, a personal method of determining what should remain and what should be discarded.

       

Friday, May 12, 2017

Connections

   
     A hug or a handshake, a loving embrace, spoken and written words, lyrics and music, connections serve  many purposes; we need to be in touch with each other.
     In the beginning of life, babies prefer the connection with mother.  Later, teenagers want to connect to their peer group as their status seems to increase with the number and frequency of text messages.
     Lovers desire a connection with their special someone that will last a lifetime.  Business people want connections that will make them money and advance their careers.  Politicians need to connect with voters to get them into office and keep them there.  Performers like to connect with their audience and fans.
    Some people enjoy a connection with their pets, while others value most their attachment to the spirit world.  Older adults are glad that their personal connections are still alive.
     Connections can be temporary or lifelong, serious or frivolous, remain strong or weaken with time.  The past, present, and future connect to create your life story.
   
   

Monday, May 8, 2017

Get through the day


Plan and prepare the day before for what lies ahead.  Care for yourself, your health, your potential.

Awaken all your senses, open your mind to various options, adjust toward a positive attitude.

Prioritize, be flexible, and change your mind and actions when advisable.

Realize human nature aims for survival and values cooperation.  Appreciate, create, be proud.

Don't define yourself as sinful or label behavior as good or bad.

If you regret some behavior, forgive yourself, learn from mistakes.

Don't judge or hold grudges.  Forgive others for what you perceive as wrongs against you.

Don't let the weather influence your mood.  The earth creates what it needs.

Take one moment at a time.  Add some joy to the world.  Have a worthwhile day!

Thursday, May 4, 2017

Get through the night


the dark, the unknown, heartbreak and pain, to make sense of the chaos, to search for reasons and explanations, to hope for relief.  What does it take to get you through the night?
     You may want answers to go forward, desire help from others, and cling to the idea of a higher power providing protection and aid.  Or  you may concentrate on building personal strength to roll with the punches, realize you must face adversity using your own resources, and adjust to discomfort as a natural  part of life.
     We must live in night as well as day with the unknown as well as answers and experience suffering as well as comfort.  Adapting to reality helps us survive.
   

Sunday, April 9, 2017

Repetition

   
     Repetition can help us learn, remember, and improve a skill; however, too much repetition may make a groove in our minds, like a path cutting through the woods, a saw cutting through a tree.  The groove may become permanent which can be considered beneficial or destructive.
     When we continue to listen to and talk about the same topics or opinions, we can exhaust our imagination to consider other opinions.  We narrow our perspective; our path gets deeper instead of wider.
     Politicians repeat mottoes, mantras, and messages to form a path to the voting machine, then after elections, they keep repeating for support and agreement.  Only when their path is unsuccessful do they begin to widen their perspective.
     Worship services often include repetitions of memorized responses, statements, and prayers. Depending on your perspective, this can be viewed as reinforcement of beliefs or looked at as brainwashing.
     Repetition has advantages and drawbacks, can be a help or a hindrance.  Don't get stuck in a rut.

Friday, April 7, 2017

What world

   
     Every person lives in a particular physical place outside the body but also lives inside the mind. The physical place includes home, surrounding areas, and the world.  The locale also includes the people in our lives.  Inside the mind are memories, emotions, imagination, opinions, and hopes for the future.  All these facets make up many worlds.
     What world do you prefer?  Being in nature, exploring new places, socializing with friends and family, participating in physical activities, making or listening to music, enjoying food and drink, intimate relationships.  Or reliving memories, feeling emotions, forming opinions, discovering new ideas, planning the future, relying on spirituality or reason.
     Everyone dwells in many worlds both physical and mental.  Circumstances may force us into spending more time in some worlds than others.  Our preferences often place us in worlds where we get the most satisfaction and pleasure.  A well-rounded person should try to find a healthy balance.
     Some people don't want a balance.  They have chosen their world and refuse to enter another.  They may prefer a cocoon of their own making, to remain in their traditions and habits, resisting change, denying a need for improvement.  Many idealize the past, want to do what feels good, and prefer not to rock the boat.  Some people will dismiss reality in order to live in delusion.
     The world around us and within us exist at the same time.  Each influences the other.  Be aware of the many colors that surround you and become part of you.
 

Monday, April 3, 2017

Manipulation

   
     Manipulation is at work whether we are aware or unaware.  Someone wants us to agree with their way of thinking.  Perhaps the manipulator feels it is for our own good, or perhaps it will just further their own goals,
     When someone is trying to hold us back or push us forward, standing up for our own ideas is difficult.  Outside influences can persuade us to follow the crowd of our families, friends, culture, and religion.  We may be more comfortable being part of a group and less confident in forming our own unique opinions.  We seldom are encouraged to think for ourselves, to question our group or its leaders, to have the courage to face the repercussions.  Feelings of disloyalty and guilt may hamper us from believing something different.
      We should honor our parents, our spouse, and experts in their respective fields, but we should most honor our own minds, our ability to think on our own.  If you have been up close and personal with someone who has had a stroke or other brain injury, the sudden decrease in brain function is shocking.  If you have witnessed someone with dementia who is gradually losing function, the tragedy is heartbreaking.  Put great value on your ability to think and don't overvalue the thoughts of others.  Don't be a lump of clay; form your own ideas.
   

Friday, March 31, 2017

Change

   
     Change happens to our thinking.  We evolve, develop, and mature throughout our lives.  The mind takes in information: facts, spins, and untruths, then decides what to keep or throw away.  We may reinforce our opinions or rethink, question, and modify.   Many people seem more comfortable keeping their present opinions and don't want to change their minds.
     Change happens in the world.  New discoveries in science, psychology, and many other fields update our knowledge.  Technology spreads this knowledge at an ever increasing pace.  It also spreads info that is biased and untrue.  Our ability to analyze this info with an open mind is an asset.
     A famous Greek philosopher once said that change is the only constant in life.  Some opinions will be held for a lifetime because that is our truth; however, we should welcome changes that lead to the improvement of our thinking.
   
 

Monday, March 27, 2017

Emotion

   
     Some emotions are natural, perhaps instinctive, stemming from our DNA.  Some emotions are learned, or at least the emotional expressions and behaviors are learned.  Some emotions are acceptable, encouraged, and rewarded.  Others are deemed unacceptable, discouraged, and expected to be suppressed.  Religions label some emotions as sinful, harmful to self and others.
    Emotions help define our unique personalities.  Some people seem to face life more emotionally than others.  How they feel is their primary reaction.  Because of this, reason and logic may be secondary.  They may become sentimental and get good vibes from emotional events and stories or become moody and blue.  Often, they are swayed by emotional appeals.  Excessive anxiety and worry may cause problems.
     The connection between emotion and thought may be similar to which came first the chicken or the egg.  We may feel before we think, but after we do both, logic should prevail over emotion.

Thursday, March 23, 2017

Escape

   
     To get away from it all at least temporarily, perhaps not to solve a problem, but just a respite so upon return, more able to face the unchangeable.
     Escape comes in many forms: a vacation, a walk in nature, a good book, movie, or play, making music or listening, sports as a participant or observer, video games, puzzles, creating or appreciating art, a glass of wine or two.  Some escape reality by going into the spirit world, like a child curling up in a parent's lap.  Some never return to face the harsh facts of life and death.
     A temporary escape is a healthy retreat to reboot, refresh, and revitalize, to allow the body, mind, and emotions take a well-deserved break.  When a permanent escape is desired, we may create a fog, a distorted reality, a disconnect from the necessary struggle, preventing our ability to grow toward wisdom.  Beware of prolonging your escape.

Saturday, February 25, 2017

Confirmation Bias





Some people have this set of behaviors:

Consider preconceived opinions and beliefs correct
Search for or interpret info in a way that confirms preconceptions
Resist info that contradicts present opinions
Tend to believe negative info about other opinions
Feel uncomfortable with changing mindset

Some people have this set of behaviors:

Realize preconceived opinions and beliefs may be incorrect
Search for the truth
Consider a variety of opinions
Recognize bias, propaganda, and spin
Open the mind to the possibility of change

If you have the first set of behaviors, you have confirmation bias.








Saturday, January 28, 2017

Happy Chemicals

   
     Your brain produces happy chemicals which reward you with good feelings.  Taking good care of your physical, mental, and emotional health increases these chemicals.
     Sufficient sleep, nutrition, and exercise help us feel good.  Favorite foods and special treats like chocolate are known to boost our mood.  Running, even walking, swimming, dancing, and sports can add to our feelings of happiness.
     Social bonding and cuddling with people or pets make our brain feel good.  Massage can reduce stress and create a feel-good state.
     Meditation and other relaxation techniques are helpful.  Some people get a boost participating in religious rituals.  Music also has it's charms.
     Feeling self-confident,  practicing positive thinking, and accomplishing goals make our brain happy.  Laughter can produce those happy chemicals.  Gratitude also works.
     Be aware that some unhealthy habits can also produce these chemicals temporarily but in the end, can cause unhappiness or worse.
     Do whatever it takes to help your brain function toward happiness. Also, create happiness in the lives of others which benefits them and yourself.
       

Friday, January 13, 2017

Absurd

   
     What seems absurd to you, unreasonable, illogical, irrational, or nonsensical, usually applies to someone else, not yourself.  Being aware of our own absurdities is almost impossible.
     We look at ideas and opinions vastly different from our own and find it difficult to see how anyone could believe that.  Our beliefs are usually backed up by our culture, our family, and our religion.  We think we have the best, most accurate ideas here in the USA, in the typical middle-class suburbs, where most people mirror their parents and neighbors.  What they believe, we usually believe, maybe with some minor differences.
     Those from distant lands and foreign cultures often seem odd as do those in our own country who don't look like us, sound like us, or believe like us.  Some of their behaviors and  practices seem absurd.  More absurd are agnostics or atheists who many believe have completely missed the boat.
     In addition, look at all those politicians who don't agree with you.  They seem full of nonsense.  They haven't just missed the boat, they have lost their minds.  If only they had our sense, our logic.
     Apples and oranges are not the same.  One is not better or more correct than the other.  Compare the similarities as much as the differences.

   

Monday, January 9, 2017

Misconceptions

   
     Living with misconceptions may be more comfortable than desiring to discover the truth.  Continuing our lives just as they are today may be preferred over changing our minds.
     Many misconceptions have been passed on for numerous generations and are hard to dismiss because that would mean realizing that our ancestors were mistaken, that your family has ingrained in you from birth a belief based on faulty thinking.  Feelings of disloyalty might be felt all around.
     Giving up some misconceptions may also mean giving up presumed perks, facing harsh realities, and admitting you  have been wrong.  We might prefer continuing life without question, investigation, or change.
     Some misconceptions are temporary until evidence proves them false or lack of evidence exists to prove them correct.  We need to challenge the status quo, clear our minds, and live with the truth.
     Something may be blocking you from seeing the whole picture, creating a blind spot to reality.  Clarify your vision, then encourage others to think clearly which is a much better legacy than passing on misconceptions.

Saturday, January 7, 2017

Warmth

   
     Winter reminds us of what it feels like to lack warmth.  We need a coat, a blanket, a furnace to provide comfort.  Our bodies cannot survive the cold without a lot of help.
     Distance also contributes to our lack of warmth.  We need connection, communication, and understanding to provide comfort.  We need others to keep us emotionally warm.  A disconnect can chill us as much as a cold wind.
     Don't miss opportunities to communicate, show interest in others, and increase understanding.  You will benefit as much as they will.  Even though you may prefer your peers, take the time to really connect and understand others, especially your family.  Give hugs and kisses, but be sure your words and tone of voice convey warmth.