Hindsight

   
     After a decision was made or an action was taken, we may look back in hindsight and realize we may have regrets about the past.  We may wonder, "If I could go back, would I do it differently; should I have done something else?"
     How different our lives might be today, if we had made other decisions.  The past can't be changed, but we can learn from it and possibly make amends.  The past was a different time when equal rights and expectations regarding women were still in their infancy.  Men trusted the corporate world to provide them a ladder up to success.  Relocating away from home seemed like an adventure, but now we may realize the advantages of living close to family.  Or the opposite may be true.  Staying close to home may have limited our potential.
     We may have been careless or insensitive in a relationship.  Apologies may be in order.  We may have neglected to do the right thing and need to make amends.  New discoveries may have allowed us to change our minds about a person or about our opinions on issues.
     Some people think, " If I could do it all over again, I would do the same thing."  Others think they are living out their destiny.   No mater what, we can look back on our lives, learn from possible mistakes, and make amends when advisable.
      When we look back on a year or on a lifetime, opportunity is always available to use our hindsight to improve our future.

Hate

   
     An extreme dislike aimed at a variety of targets: a particular person, a certain group or philosophy; a disability, decline in health, pain, and suffering; lack of basic essentials; suppression of human rights; cruelty, violence, crime, abuse of power, plus other behavior judged as evil.
     Many people believe that hate is something we should strive to eliminate from our emotions and actions because it isn't nice or proper to feel this way.  Often, we deny or even fool ourselves into believing we don't have this "embarrassing" emotion.  Hate seems negative, but it can spur us on toward positive outcomes.
     In infancy, discomfort is felt: too cold, too hot, hunger, thirst, pain, neglect.  Our wails signal others who will help us survive.  Later, fear creeps in as we anticipate something unpleasant, and in some cases, phobias develop.  Anger adds to the mix.
     Self-hate can develop when we are too critical of ourselves or dislike a part of ourselves, a physical attribute, a personality trait or shortcoming, a lack of purpose, guilt over past or present behavior.  Comparing yourself to an ideal or feeling jealousy towards others can lead to low self-esteem and depression.
     Many religions define humans as sinful beings who deserve punishment.  These believers may become judgmental of themselves and others, then feel a need for forgiveness from a supernatural power.  Some think humans are sinful from day one and will always fall short of what they should be.
     Hate can cause harm to yourself and others.  It can upset you emotionally and physically.  The hated and the hater can suffer the consequences.  However, we can recognize and accept hate as a natural and normal emotion and use it to make positive changes in ourselves and the world.
 
   
   

See Something - Say Something

     Be aware and notice when something or someone doesn't seem right.  Saying something about it may save lives.  That's exactly what author Angie Thomas does in her novel "The Hate U Give."  As a black woman, she sees and understands what isn't right with an American situation that affects us all, then says something, writes a story so well through the eyes of her main character Starr Carter.  Starr also sees a tragedy and must be a witness to the event.  Her family and neighborhood must cope with this tragedy and it's aftermath.

     This novel shows the culture, language, and behavior of blacks and whites alike.  Hate breeds hate; fear breeds fear.  We need to see and understand when something isn't right and try to correct it.      

Suspend Disbelief

   
     Superheroes with superpowers can take us away into a fantasy world.  Our imagination can cause us to believe temporarily something beyond reason and logic; we suspend our disbelief.  Fiction and film use many techniques to draw us into the story.
     Mythology of the Greeks, Romans, and other cultures have given us many characters and stories which provided an explanation of the mysteries of life.  We can still enjoy those myths of the past and also get transported through special effects into a fantastic universe of the future.
     Suspension of disbelief can allow us to be entertained by unrealistic characters and situations; however, turning off logic long-term can cause us to believe that which is untrue.  The supernatural, magical, and miraculous seem possible.  Understanding the natural world is complex enough, that adding supernatural elements creates confusion and conflict.
     Throughout your life, make sure the hero you admire is real and be content with natural powers.  Suspend your disbelief to enjoy a tale of fantasy, but keep the logic turned on in real life.
   

A New Day

 
      Every day is new but can be overshadowed with yesterdays and tomorrows.  Comparing the present to what we remember in the past and to what we imagine will be in the future is a natural and automatic activity which can be a help or a hindrance.
     Each breath of air we take is a step into a new day.  It may be an improvement after a stale,  unpleasant breath, a time to anticipate a better future, or it could be the best air we will ever breathe.  We should appreciate and optimize the present, inhale the positive and exhale the negative.
     The past has value and has led us to the present which leads us to the future, but the here and now is the most valuable time of all.  When we place more value on the past, wish for the good old days, and resist change, our life can become stale.  When we put our hopes onto the future, we can miss the value of today.   By putting too much confidence in what happened in the past, what was written about the past, what may have relevance only in the past, we can overshadow the new: scientific discoveries, evolution of ideas, and logical thinking.  By believing the best is yet to come, we may miss the beauty of right now.
     Seize the day, see what's happening now, try to understand yourself and the world around you.  Breathe in the fresh air of a new day.

Keeping Up

   
     Even with good time management, we have trouble keeping up.  Jobs, chores, school work, family obligations are on our to-do list which gets even longer as other tasks are added.
     Some items on our list are truly essential; others can be eliminated.  We can delegate some items and place them on someone else's list.  Realize why your list seems so long.  Influences from family members, tradition, and advertising can unfairly contribute to our obligations.
      Keeping up with the Joneses is an expression that reveals we may make decisions based on what our neighbors, friends, and family are doing.  Some people would rather feel accepted as part of the crowd than be individuals.  They allow others to set the standards, then perpetuate the activities.
     At Christmas time, we can get stressed and even frantic trying to decorate, celebrate, buy gifts, send cards and letters, attend services, give and attend parties, some activities enjoyable, some not so much.   Other holidays and birthdays can have the same effect.  We seem to buy our way through special days whether the money and time are well spent or not.
     Decide for yourself what you want to do and keep those doors open.  Decide what you don't want to do and close the door on those activities.  Realize the Joneses don't always know what's best.