Fear

     Some fears are helpful, even necessary for survival.  Other fears are learned from our own life experiences and from being aware of the world around us.  Another type of fear can occur from inexperience, trying something for the first time, or being unprepared.
     Some say imagining the worst case scenario and preparing for it can ease your fears.  Next imagining the other possible outcomes and judging the odds can help calm the worry.  We also need to realize that exaggerated worry and fear can complicate situations and cause further problems within ourselves and those around us.
     Many people ease their fears with strong religious beliefs that they are being watched over, guided, and protected by God.  Others live with the unknown and try to control their fears with caution and courage.
     Unfortunately, some people try to use your fears to manipulate you.  They manufacture false fears or exaggerate your present fears while presenting themselves as the solution to your problems.  Hopefully, we all can face the future with confidence and courage and realize the truth in FDR's quote, "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself."

    

Back Then

     When we compare the way it was back then when we were young to the way it is now when our grandchildren are growing up,  some things seem better now while others seem to have been better then.  Each generation has a different kind of childhood.
     Back then, most moms were housewives while the dads went to work.  Divorce was uncommon, and single-parent families were rare.  Children walked to school, and neighborhoods seemed quite safe.  We amused ourselves with indoor and outdoor games, rode bikes, and roller skated.  Girls played with dolls and wanted to be like mom.  We listened to the radio and the record player.  Birthday parties were simple affairs with Pin the Tail on the Donkey and Musical Chairs.
     Women weren't encouraged to work outside the home.  Girls seldom learned any sports.  To write a school report, we had to use the card catalog.  Not many people flew or traveled extensively.  Without many immunizations, children got the measles, mumps, chicken pox, and polio.
     What we have now we didn't have then.  What we had then will never be again.

Suffering

     Witnessing another person suffering physical or mental problems makes us want to give aid and comfort, to help however we can, but when everything possible is being done by the medical community, we can only do our best to be a good friend, relative, or caretaker.
     Eventually the physical body wears out from aging and disease. We appreciate when modern health care relieves pain and prolongs life, but we still wonder why the elderly must suffer.  Some people find solace in religion and prayer and hope for miracles.  Other people realize that suffering and dying is not fair and is out of our control.
     Caretakers also suffer as they do their best to help.  They are sad when their loved one is going through such a hard time.  They can become stressed and exhausted.  When they are related, the caretakers may wonder if they may be genetically predisposed to have the same malady, the same death.
     A big part of life is taking care of each other.  The experiences aren't always pleasant, but doing the right thing is a reward in itself.  While we are able, we can help those who need it.  Soon we may be the ones who need care.

Hip

     Being hip and grownup is difficult but possible.  Grownups have seen many versions of what is hip come and go, while the young think their version is best.  Although we may tend to value a version from our past, we need to keep an open mind and use our perspective, not prejudice, to evaluate the latest trends.
     If we want to understand and influence the young, we need to view what is hip through their eyes before we judge and criticize.  After doing our best to respect their view, we can share our own perspective and values.  As we honor their ideas, hopefully they will honor ours in return.
     We should also be cautious about being stuck in the past.  We may even grow to like some of the new hip ideas.  Sometimes our hip wears out and needs a replacement.

Daddy State

     If you  want your government to regulate social behavior and to protect citizens even from themselves, you might prefer a daddy state.  This paternalistic style implies that citizens with too much freedom may make selfish and immoral decisions.
     Often this style of leadership claims its authority from the biggest Daddy of all and uses religion as a basis for making laws.  Faith-based subsidies and vouchers are often presented as the "cure" for public education.  Marriage is defined in the most traditional way as only valid between a man and a woman.  Women need to have their freedom limited when it comes to controlling their own bodies and using contraception.
     Citizens would never want a government of Big Brother monitoring social behavior and punishing citizens who broke the rules.  Today, however, some politicians think government needs to set the rules based on Father Knows Best.

Prejudice

     Put your prejudice aside, but is this possible for anyone to do?  Can the influence of our personal history overshadow any chance of  having a fresh perspective, or will we always tend to agree with what we already believe?  As we age, we pile up even more personal history which should give us the wisdom to understand multiple points of view as long as prejudice doesn't inhibit our thinking.
     Taking a fresh perspective doesn't mean we will change our minds.  It can just give us a break in listening to our broken record, a chance to look in a variety of directions even if we come full circle back to our own original point of view.
     When trying to persuade others to your point of view, you need to present your "argument" backed up with facts.  You also need to present a counterargument which shows how other opinions are not as valid as yours.  This is basic freshman composition.
     Some of our convictions will never change, and maybe they shouldn't; however, we need to remember the times in our lives when we were mistaken and needed to change our minds.  Our thinking was clarified.  We shouldn't be afraid to break away from narrow-minded, worn-out opinions.  At times, we need to see the advantages of change and the disadvantages of becoming stagnant.  If we can look beyond prejudice, if we can honor other opinions as well as our own, if we can refresh our thinking, wisdom will be our reward.
  

Clothes

     Humans need clothes to protect themselves from the elements and to provide comfort.  Society then adds the elements of  modesty, gender, and tradition.  Clothing may also function as a form of adornment and an expression of style.
     Male clothing is often more practical and allows more freedom to move and even run when necessary.  Men's clothes don't usually disguise or exaggerate the shape of their bodies and allow more modesty and comfort.  Many women think a man in a tux is at his sexiest. 
     Women's clothing is often designed to attract men. The figure is often pulled in or pushed up to exaggerate the shape, and modesty aside when arms, bosoms, and midriffs are exposed.  Movement is often inhibited with skirts and high heels, and comfort doesn't seem to be considered.  Some colors and fabrics are gender specific... think pink and blue.  Lace, satin, and see-through fabrics are almost always on women.   Many men think a woman in practically nothing is at her sexiest. 
     So, ladies, let's be brave and take a stand.  Refuse the Spanx and platform shoes.  We can show the world that feminine beauty can come with comfort and sensible style.  Men can use their imagination for a change and focus on real beauty.      

Comments

     Those comments you make on facebook posts mean a lot to your friends.  They know someone has seen their pictures and read their messages.  As you learn about their lives, interests, and opinions, your comments give feedback, good wishes, compliments, answers to questions, and your opinions of agreement or opposition and sometimes provide smiles, laughter, and affection.
     Two-way communication increases friendships with those near and far and even with distant relatives you've never met.  Facebook is just one of many ways we connect with each other.  Everyday I go to the computer to read the posts and see the pics.
     The next time you enjoy a friend's post, take just a few seconds to comment.  Everyone likes to hear from a friend.

Rebel

     If a rebel is a person who resists authority, control, or tradition, then I am a rebel.  I can abide the authority of the government that makes and upholds the laws to maintain a civilized society as long as all citizens have equal rights and can make their own personal, private decisions such as those concerning marriage and family planning.  Government, however, should not mix their authority with religion.
     Some people yield to a divine authority who guides them through scriptures which contain commandments of what you should and should not do.   Religious leaders then interpret how these scriptures apply to today's world.
     At times, we all give control and power over to someone other than ourselves.  When we are young and inexperienced, our parents should have control of us, but as we gain more wisdom, we should need less control.
     A rebel also questions traditions which are passed down within a society.  Just look at the calendar to see all the national and religious holidays that society has agreed to celebrate on the same day every year.  Our national holidays stir up patriotism and loyalty to our country, while religious observances and holidays help reinforce the faith.  Most religious services follow a traditional pattern.  The ways we celebrate holidays are often very traditional from fireworks to Christmas trees, from turkey to Valentine hearts.  Traditions are comforting and help us relive pleasant memories of the past, and as we repeat them, we pass them on to the next generation.
     As a rebel, I better understand those people who question authority and tradition, who wish to design their own lives and allow others to design theirs. We  can truly enjoy freedom.
     

A Mission

     A child is often asked, "What do you want to be when you grow up?"  As  grownups we can ask ourselves, "What else do I want to be or do?"  After raising a family, having a career, and helping your friends, you may want to think about what you want to do with your time, talents, experiences, and interests.  Retirement gives us the opportunity to relax, have fun, and pursue hobbies.  It also allows us to focus on ourselves, investigate new interests, and rethink our opinions of what is really important to us.
     Business, church, and school organizations often write mission statements to define who they are and to state their purposes and goals.  Individuals can write personal mission statements to analyze their strengths and interests and clarify what they want to accomplish.  Some of our goals may only concern ourselves, our health, and our enjoyment of life, while other goals include helping our friends, families, and favorite organizations.  We may choose to spend time thinking more deeply into the important questions of life.  We may find some answers, yet realize that some questions will never be answered.
     We need to keep our bodies and minds active and stay connected to the world.  Decide what else you want to do and have a mission for the rest of your life.