Mama’s Last Hug

   
     Mama, a chimpanzee matriarch, was near death, but when a biologist she had known for forty years came to visit, she showed joy through her smile, her sounds, and gentle strokes of his hair and pats on his head. She then gave him a last hug.  This demonstration showed emotions and feelings that all of us primates share.  Author Frans de Waal is a primatologist who has studied animal emotions and associated facial expressions, sounds, gestures, and behaviors.  Some of the many emotions all primates share include sadness, happiness, love, hate, anger, fear, disgust, shame, guilt, depression, pride, sympathy, empathy, affection, and sexual desire.
     De Waal states: "I believe that all the emotions we are familiar with can be found one way or another in all mammals." "Primates are made to be social, made to care about each other, made to get along, and the same applies to us." "Emotions can be good, bad, and ugly, which is as true for animals as it is for us."
     All primates including humans have many similar physical characteristics like having hands, forward facing eyes, and large brains.  We also have similar emotions, facial expressions, and gestures.  Even our behaviors are similar.  Frans de Waal writes about animal emotions and what they tell us about ourselves.

Values Shift

     As decades pass, values shift.  As phases of life are completed and new phases begin, values shift and evolve.  What was important may lose or gain relevance, be changed or downgraded.  New values may replace old.
     The importance of being in fashion may shift to comfort and practicality.  Some possessions and responsibilities may become burdensome and deemed unnecessary and a shift to a simpler life may be desirable.  As short term goals are satisfied, long term goals may become more logical.  What other people deem important may not matter as much as our own opinions.  Pleasing others may shift to making sure our own needs are met.  The list of what I shouldn't do gets shorter, and what I want to do may get more status.
     We learn to listen to our own voice and value our unique, one-of-a-kind self.  As we accumulate past experiences and our outlook on the future matures, we make better decisions.  A flexible and inquisitive frame of mind keeps us relevant to others but more importantly to ourselves.  We may improve our ability to influence others.  Wisdom enters in as we age.  We should appreciate it and not let anyone diminish it.
     Some of us remember learning to drive a stick shift and then later having the ease of  an automatic.  We still have to get out of neutral to move forward.  In order to move forward in our thinking, in order to evolve, our mind needs to shift gears.  We can value the past and honor our elders, even build on their wisdom, yet not value their opinions more than our own.  Use your freedom, allow yourself to go forward and let your values shift.

Half of us are women

     Women balance the population when given equal rights.  Too much power to men causes many problems and inhibits progress.
     On the average, men have a little more physical strength than women, and this edge may have started the whole thing.  The male could dominate the female, and she in turn assumed a submissive role.  When this seemed a little barbaric, men saw themselves as protecting the weaker female and providing an income for the family, but equal rights were still unheard of.  These ideas even persist today as the traditional family has the male going out into the world, developing his earning power, and being the head of the house.   The traditional wife takes the role of stay-at-home mom.  This situation can have drawbacks for the husband and the wife.  Being the sole provider puts a lot of stress on the traditional husband and limits the development of the wife.  Then when the stay-at-home mom tries to reenter the workforce after being at home for a decade or more, she often has a great deal of difficulty finding an appropriate job.  Families that can survive on one income have more of a choice, but many families require two  incomes. 
     Our society still has a way to go to encourage women to educate themselves to the fullest, develop their potential, and go out into the world.  Of course, disparity exists when the male gets paid more than the female for the same job.  Women are still striving toward equality in pay and opportunities.
     Patriarchal societies, governments, and religions still give more power to the male.  Often tradition and many religions still perpetrate this imbalance as coming from God, thinking He has set up these traditional roles.  Leadership positions are mainly in the hands of men who like the power and often have trouble seeing the advantages of equality.  The female perspective and positive contributions are often undervalued.
     Pregnancy and caring for very young children may create another prejudice against females.  Some occupations do allow sufficient leave for the mom and sometimes for the dad, but more needs to be done to allow parents to care for their very young children.  Affordable day care is a help, some even set up on the premises of the parent's employer.  When both parents work, home chores need to be fairly assigned.
     The mindset of the modern world needs to encourage equality from birth.  The young boy shouldn't be our "buddy" while the girl is our "sweetie."  Our education system is making some strides encouraging both sexes to develop their potential and think in terms of careers, especially those jobs that will be in greatest demand in the future that will provide sufficient financial compensation.  Our society also needs to encourage both sexes to be creative and contribute to society whether in the arts or sciences.  The simple solution: treat boys and girls as equal human beings and enable them to pave their own way and support themselves.
     Women are learning they must be proactive and make the changes.  Men and women must evolve beyond the past and into an improved future.  Better the balance, better the world.