ANTIQUE

 

Six chairs used by my great-grandparents could be considered antiques.  They certainly are old but may not be rare.  You may have old items handed down in your family but the value may not be in what you might sell them for.  They could be a part of your family's history but often have outlasted their usefulness, perhaps just taking up space in the attic.

The lesson may be that even though we are old, we don't want to be antique.  Our possessions may or may not have value to future generations.  While we are alive, let's hope that our thoughts and attitudes are not old-fashioned, that we can be part of today.  The style of our possessions may be out-dated and not valued by the modern-day world.  Our thinking can be up-dated as we age.  We can pass on memories of our past,  even our possessions that we have accumulated.  As each decade passes, our wisdom should increase especially if we allow our thinking to evolve and be fresh. 

If someone could not see you but only hear or read your words, what would they think? Would you seem contemporary or old-fashioned?  Don't become an antique.  Be useful and keep up with the times. 

DISCOVERY

Discover something new.  Columbus and his men sailed west to find a new route to the east but instead discovered another land.  This land was already inhabited by indigenous people.  These two groups of people had to discover a way to relate to each other.  America is still adding to this story.

Discovering something new helps humans survive, evolve, and get along with each other.  The physical sciences add to our knowledge of the world.   Social sciences help us understand each other and form better relationships.  As America looks back on its history, we celebrate heroes and events and also see mistakes that were made.

As we look back on our personal history, we may take pride in our accomplishments and at the same time, see mistakes that we made.  We can discover ways to change our attitudes and behavior and make amends.        

Always be open to discover something new about ourselves, each other, and the world.            

  

What makes you old?

Setting aside an aging body, notice other aspects of your life that can make you old.  For the most part, biological aging is inevitable.  We can stay as healthy as possible, but aging is part of nature.  Once we accept this aging process, we can focus on other behaviors that make us old.

When we label ourselves as looking old: skin changes, graying hair or hair loss, gravity taking its toll, and diminishing physical prowess, we begin to idealize being younger.  Don't concern yourself with what is only skin-deep.  By  accepting nature's way, we are  telling ourselves and others that beauty comes in many forms.

Becoming set in our ways can make us old.  Doing things the way we have always done them or how our parents have done them can cause us to become stagnant.  Remembering our past as the good old days may blind us to the advantages of the present.  Opening our eyes and minds to a variety of ways of doing things can keep us from living in the past.  Trying to understand the younger generations can broaden our minds and deepen our thinking.  

As they say, getting older beats the alternative.  Don't idealize the past; honor the present and be part of today's world.

   

ESCAPE

 Escape from and escape to.   Leave physically or mentally and go toward something better.  Escape from dangerous, war-torn or gang-controlled communities and escape to safety.  Escape from a bad relationship and go toward being alone or making a better relationship.  These escapes can save your life.  Escape from loneliness and make meaningful contact with others.  Escape from boredom, read, write, find a purpose, learn something new, create through any form of art.  Escape from stress, simplify or change your routine.  Escape from brainwashing and manipulation and gain confidence in your own thinking.

Some escapes may be permanent, a real change.  Other escapes may be temporary: vacations, entertainments, get-away-from-it-all persuits.  Some escapes can be healthy; some not so much: alcohol, drugs, empty calories.  Unhealthy escapes can become addictive.  

Perhaps instead of searching for an escape, our regular situation needs to be analyzed.  Instead of escaping, we may need to make changes in our lifestyle.

Prisoners often want to escape but are confined to make our society safer.  Sometimes, we have self-imposed limitations and need to create our own escape.  When your life doesn't seem satisfying or fulfilling, escape from what isn't working for you and escape to something that will help you accomplish your goals.

 

RULER

RULER is an acronym for the five skills of emotional intelligence developed at Yale with the goal to integrate social and emotional learning, to  create a healthier and more compassionate society.  People of all ages learn how leaders lead, teachers teach, students learn, and families support students.

Pay attention and recognize your emotions and how facial expressions, vocal changes, and body language reflect emotions.  Also recognize the emotions of others.  Understand the causes of unwanted or negative feelings and  promote positive ones.  Also understand the consequences of emotions.  Label emotions by finding the best words to describe feelings.  Express emotions appropriately and evaluate the best time, place, and way to be effective.  Regulate and manage your feelings to be successful and build your emotional and social intelligence.

 By using this RULER, you can benefit your own life and the lives of those around you.

Minimalism

 Many of us have more than we need, instead of just the essentials.  The less we have the more space we free up and the more time to devote to other pursuits.  The less we buy the more money we can save.  The less stress we have the better our health can become.

We allow marketing of products and services to manipulate us to consume more than we need.  Some ads make us think we are not enough, not cool enough, not pretty enough.  Promises of beauty and youthful appearance tempt us to buy products and services.  Promises of luxury transportation, tempt us to purchase the latest vehicle.  Trying to keep up with friends and neighbors adds pressure to have more stuff.  Stuff can become clutter and disorganization.

Money spent on needless products often only give fleeting happiness, if any at all.  The solution to all this craziness is donate stuff you don't need and don't buy more of the same.  As long as you have basic necessities and funds for emergencies and retirement, your life will be simplified.  Save money instead of overspending.  Get rid of debt and enjoy your freedom.

Consuming less is better for the environment.  Less trash produces a better cleaner world.  

As you spend less money on nonessentials, spend less time on what doesn't matter.  This will give you more time for the important things, the simple things of life,  plus time to relax, learn, and create.

Practice minimalism.  Less is more.

Self-Actualization

 After basic bodily and ego needs have been fulfilled, the highest level of psychological development is self-actualization as shown by Maslow's hierarchy.  He believed that needs lower down in the hierarchy must be satisfied before individuals can attend to the needs higher up.  The physiological needs including air, water, food, shelter, sleep, clothing, and reproduction are essential for survival.  Next come safety needs of personal security, employment, and health.  Love and belonging in friendship, intimacy, and family give connection to others.  Esteem is found in respect, status, self-respect, and freedom.  Self-actualization is the need to become the most that you can be, to fulfill your potential.

The documentary "The Secret" based on the book by Rhonda Byrne claims that self-actualization pivots on the Laws of Attraction: that is  think positively, and positive things will come to you.  Be grateful for what you have instead of focusing on what you don't have.  Next visualize what you want, believe it can happen and you will receive your desires.  Thought can become things. The fallacy here is that wishing even with planning does not always grant your wishes.

Many people around the world have a great struggle just to attain their basic physiological needs.  Those that are secure in meeting these basic needs may continue the struggle going up the pyramid.  Too many roadblocks stop their progress.  Those of us that are fortunate enough to near the top of the pyramid may be slowed toward self-actualization by our culture, society, and even those that we love.  Some people even dwell in self-defeating behaviors that stop them from completing this last step - self-actualizatiion.

We should realize that even if we get to this step, we should feel obligated to help our fellow humans attain all that they can.   Attaining this highest form of development goes beyond ourself.  Continue developing, learning, and creating all your life and help others do the same.