Gifting

     Is Santa in control?  Both adults and children seem to enjoy this idea.  Adults like to give anonymously and experience the joy an innocent child gets from anticipating and receiving special toys from the magical character.
     Are retailers pushing the buttons?  Buyers are stirred up by advertising and special sales for weeks in advance of the holidays.  They add to the idea that acquiring things can bring happiness.
     Is tradition the biggest influence?  We continue past behaviors because we want to duplicate the happy memories.  We may feel obligated to our family and find it difficult to make changes.
     Is religion the guide?  Christians may be honoring God who gave the gift of his son.  The wise men brought gifts to the babe.  Believers may get into the spirit of giving.
     When do we take control?  Of course, hardly anyone wants to take Santa from children.  A balance can be made between "what I want" and "what can I give."  The gift can be time and simple homemade items.  This type of giving should go on all year instead of just for holidays.  Resisting pressure from retailers is difficult, but we must rely on common sense.  We can  rethink our traditions and plan what works best for us.
      December may be a time for religious observance and family tradition.  Just ask yourself who or what is influencing your decisions.  Gifting can be done all year long.  

Evil

     Some say that evil begins by going against God's will, that He is the source of good and has revealed His standards for human behavior.  Going against these standards is sinful.  Some also believe that Satanic forces are a source of evil.
     Non-religious explanations begin with the idea that nature is neither good or bad.  Individuals and societies down through history have tried to determine better ways to behave so we all can survive and have satisfying lives.  Many moral standards are agreed upon to enhance life.  When we are too selfish and neglect or harm others, our behavior can lead to immorality.  Individuals and society suffer.
     Often, it is easier to see evil in others, but we need to recognize if and when it begins to creep into our lives.  Perhaps it is a coincidence, but by reversing evil, we discover life as it should be.

Familiarity

     Knowing more about a person or a group can cause a variety of reactions.  As you discover what you have in common and appreciate the good qualities, familiarity can breed understanding and sympathy. When you begin to focus on differences, you can either appreciate the unique qualities or judge them as faults.   Familiarity can then breed contempt.  When you enjoy family, old friends, places, and traditions, familiarity can breed contentment.  When you are only content within your comfort zone or refuse to consider new ideas, familiarity can breed complacency.

     On the flip side, how can people get to know you better?  Your family and old friends will be the most familiar with you because they have had the time to understand your personality and have witnessed many facets of your life.  You also know them, their good points and their faults. You have sympathy for each other.  Try to extend  these feelings to others who cross your path and get to know them and let them know you.

     The majority of people in the world you will never meet or get to know and vise versa.  Try to extend your understanding and sympathy towards them and don't let their differences out shadow what you may have in common.  As you do meet new people, keep an open heart and mind.  As you expand your circle of friends, have sympathy for all types of people and consider many viewpoints, familiarity will breed the best of reactions.

    

Should/Shouldn't

     Many people believe that a list of shalls and shall nots come from God.  They were carved in stone and written in the Bible.  Stories were recorded about how people should behave.  Many religions have similar guidelines.  Our parents instilled in us additional dos and don'ts.  Our government has decided which behaviors are legal or illegal.  Punishments then fit the crimes.  We also have modes of manners to help people get along more pleasantly.  Everyone has the freedom to devise their own opinions of what we should and shouldn't do.  In these many ways, we judge our own behavior.
     Problems arise, however, when people feel they have the right to judge others.  Keep in mind that in a democracy, we can make our own rules as long as we aren't doing something illegal.  We will learn from experience what works best for us.  Conflicts arise when we try to impose our own personal should and should nots onto others.
     We need to think about why we are judging others and why we feel the need to be so critical.  Perhaps we have so much confidence, even overconfidence, in our own opinions.  We may get a feeling of superiority when we observe others with opinions and behaviors that don't match with ours.  We can get a sense that we are right and they are wrong.  Be careful before you decide what someone else should or shouldn't do.

The Edge

     Many of us enjoy a suspenseful movie which keeps us on the edge of our seat, anxiously awaiting what is going to happen next.  A few people like to live on the edge, often involved in exciting and dangerous activities.  Some people are involved on the cutting edge of science, technology, or fashion, discovering or creating the latest or most advanced developments.
     Being on the edge of your seat can be entertaining.  Living on the edge can be fun for some but nerve-wracking for others.  Being on the cutting edge as an innovator can be a rewarding occupation or hobby.
     The edge is where we are at the threshold of the unknown.  With courage, we can leave our comfort zone, take a risk, and enjoy an exciting experience.  Just like the pioneers, we can discover something new by going to the edge and beyond.  

The Poor

    Those of us who have enough food, clothing, shelter, and health care are not poor.  Most of us have had a family that cared for and supported us.  As adults, we have been able to care for and support ourselves and our children.  We often take pride in our ability to work and pay our own bills without help from government programs.
     This pride can lead us to blame the poor for causing their own financial woes.  We feel they have shirked their responsibility to work and provide the basic needs for themselves and their families.  We may feel that continuing to give to the poor only perpetuates their dependence on government assistance.
     Many factors have combined to keep us independent:
1.  Born into a household whose income provided the basic necessities
2.  Raised respecting the values of hard work, responsibility, and independence
3.  Receiving an education to equip us for employment
4.  Getting and keeping a job
5.  Receiving sufficient preventative health care and medical attention so we can remain healthy and continue working and caring for our family.
     The absence of just one of these factors may place us in the company of the poor.  We can not take all the credit for our financial situation, nor should we blame others who don't have what they need.  Our pride may tell us that we need to withhold help in order to teach the poor a lesson.  We are the ones who need to learn a lesson, to try to understand and help each other.    

Square

     In math, a shape with equal sides and equal angles or multiplying a number by itself.  In construction, being precisely aligned.  In business, a fair deal or paying the  bill.  In personality or behavior, a square can be seen as negative or positive.
     A few decades back, labeling someone as a square was an insult.  Either the person was unaware of what it took to be "cool" or chose not to identify with "passing fancies" in dress or behavior.  To them, the old fashioned ways were fine or even superior to more modern ways of doing things.
     Some people define themselves and take pride in being a square, conventional and conservative.  Their behavior is based on past wisdom which they feel is tried and true.  They may not have confidence in newer unproven ways.
     We all need to value those conventions of the past which still work well today and tomorrow.  We also need to be open to new ideas and solutions. The old and the new may be as equal in value as the sides and angles of a square.