Shadows

      When something is between a light source and a surface, a shadow is produced.  If we think of light as being the truth, something may block our understanding and cause a shadow on our thinking.  Many obstacles block us from the light: ignorance, prejudice, and faulty reasoning, just to name three.  When we increase our knowledge, broaden our perspective, and truly use our heads, a greater amount of light will shine on our lives.
      People may intentionally or unintentionally block us from the truth. Their own ignorance or their desire to manipulate may cast a shadow on our judgement.  We may be the one casting a shadow on others.  Overconfidence in our own opinions and perpetuation of our faulty beliefs onto our children and acquaintances may cause generations to be blocked from reality.
     We may not want to be aware of the truth because it can be anywhere from uncomfortable to brutal.  The bright glare of the light may cause us to escape to the shade and shadows.  We may prefer living in unrealistic hopes and dreams.
      Temporary relief like the darkness of night may be necessary so we can deal with the daylight, but try to seek the truth even if it means coming out of the shadows.

Prayer

  
     Prayer calms and comforts, reduces stress and anger, improves self-control, directs focus, promotes forgiveness, gives a sense that someone is in control, and provides hope for solving problems.  When a group prays together, a sense of unity is promoted.  Prayer also gives a sense of accomplishment, doing something to help.
     Some believe prayer is a direct communication to a higher power who provides guidance, help, and miracles.  Some believe meditation can provide similar benefits of prayer without the religious connotations.
     Find quiet time to communicate with yourself.  Realize your own needs and be sensitive to the needs of others.  Keep your mind open to help from various sources.
 

What's in a name?

     If you are a man, your last name is your father's father's father's name and so on.   Your son(s) and his son(s), your grandson(s), will carry on that name.  Some fathers even give their sons their entire name with a Jr. added.  If you are a woman, you give up your (maiden) name the day you marry and take your husband's name which has no blood ties to yourself.
     The public often assumes a married woman has the same ethnicity as her husband.  Her accomplishments will be attributed to her husband's family.  Her children will assume the identity and ethnicity of their father and their accomplishments will go to that name.  Her son(s) will keep their father's name all their lives.  Her daughters will give up their (maiden) name and take their husband's name.  A woman's grandchildren and their accomplishments will never be attributed to their grandmother's family.  And so it goes down through history and into the future.
     This is a reflection of patriarchy.  The male name, identity, and power goes on.  In the past, the oldest son often inherited the wealth of the father.  Now, we usually try to treat sons and daughters equally with inheritances, but only the male keeps his name.
    Some couples use a hyphenated last name or give their children the mother's maiden name as their middle name, but this is only a temporary fix and gets complicated.  There is no law against a husband taking his wife's last name, but doing so is rare.  Most couples will continue in the traditional path.  They should be aware of what the woman is giving up.
     Perhaps the most realistic "solution" is to make your children aware of both sides of the family tree.  Their last name reflects only one of many, many family names.  They should take pride in being part of many families, many identities, and  many ethnicities.
     What's in a name especially a last name?  It represents only one of many names that go to make up you.
 
          

Prescribe or Describe

     Experts look at language from two points of view.  Some prescribe, define what is correct and wish to regulate others to follow the rules; others describe, record the actual usage without judgment of right and wrong.  These two points of view might also apply to how some people set rules of behavior and expect others to comply, while other people accept that behavior is varied and social mores change.
     Traditionalists feel that certain rules of behavior will always prescribe what is right and what is wrong.  These rules usually come from their group: their family, culture, or religion.  Non-traditionalists are more likely to accept a variety of behaviors, are less judgmental, and respect the rights of each person to decide how to behave.
      The objectives in language and behavior are communication and understanding.  We may prefer a certain standard especially in formal written language and in public behavior.  Expecting others to adapt to our own personal standard does not allow freedom of expression that we all hold dear in a democracy.  We need to reduce our tendency to be unyielding and judgmental, setting a standard and prescribing others to follow.  We need to see the world as it is and respect variation and diversity.
        

FOMO

   
    Fear of missing out is an anxiety that an exciting or interesting event may currently be happening elsewhere and you are not included, often revealed on social media.  This fear may also be felt when thinking that others have something of value that you desire even to the point of jealousy.
     Think of the events that you do not want to miss in life like attending your child's graduation or marriage or experiencing the joys of grand-parenthood.  Perhaps celebrating a particular birthday or anniversary is a goal.  A variety of circumstances may allow others to enjoy these experiences while you may not be able to.
     Many believers continue to be active in religion because they have a fear of missing out on heaven and other miracles.  The desire to have an afterlife and rejoin deceased relatives and friends is something they look forward to.  No one wants to miss out on the possibility of miracles.
     FOMO can be relieved when you are content with what you have and when you don't compare yourself with others.  Don't assume others have a better life or more fun than you do.  You may be surprised that many people see your life as better than theirs.  Take a big break from social media and get on with your own fun. 
   
       

Stop yourself

    
     What do you stop yourself from doing and why?  Obviously, we should stop harmful actions toward others and ourselves unless we are defending self, citizens, and country.  Harming nature, the environment, and animals should also be avoided.  In addition, we don't want to inflict psychological  harm. We stop ourselves from these behaviors because we are civilized and caring people.
     We may realize how we should stop harming ourselves physically through poor diet, lack of exercise and other bad habits, but we may not realize how we are stopping ourselves by commission or omission from developing into a more complete human being.  We may actually stunt our intellectual and emotional development.
     Using sabotage in wartime is a way to interfere with our enemy's goals, but we can also sabotage ourselves throughout our lives.  We either don't set the goal or place obstacles in the way of achievement.  Limiting our thinking can limit our imagination of what is possible.  Perhaps we were taught these limits as children that keep us from doing what our parents considered wrong.  Perhaps our self-confidence was not nurtured or the value of practicality was overemphasized.  We may have developed fears or wish to remain in a comfort zone.  Or, we may just procrastinate and get lazy.
     Only come to a complete stop when necessary.  Being cautious to avoid danger is necessary, but look forward to continue your journey.  Give yourself the green light and go.

    
          
     

Non Sequitur

     Wiley Miller's cartoon is named Non Sequitur which means "not to follow" in Latin.  In other words, an idea that does not logically follow from the previous idea. This often creates a comic effect.
      "The Inherent Difficulty of Science" depicts leaders of  three major religions holding their sacred scriptures and a scientist formulating his idea.  We may infer that basic religious beliefs make it difficult to accept certain scientific facts or that scientific beliefs make it difficult to accept certain religious claims.  Religion professes that God created science, while science professes that man discovers facts. The fallacy is that some people have no difficulty being both religious and scientific.  Other people can become absorbed into one way of thinking and discount the other.
     Some people may believe this cartoon is biased and trying to imply that religion blocks people from accepting scientific facts.  Some may be insulted; some may just get a chuckle.
         

Thoughtful

   
     When someone is thoughtful, we believe they show consideration for the needs and feelings of others.  A thoughtful person is caring, kind, and helpful.
     We should also be thoughtful towards ourselves, being conscious of our own needs and making sure those needs are met.  We should be kind to ourselves and let others know how we want to be treated.
     Thoughtful can also be a state of mind, being reflective of the past, mindful of the present, and contemplative of the future.  The opposite of being thoughtful might include: continuing traditions that don't serve a good purpose, behaving as others have decided we should, reacting emotionally on impulse, not using rational reasoning, wasting too much time on trivial pursuits, not setting aside some quiet time to be peaceful and meditative, and being on auto-pilot doing the same old same old.
     We may realize the obvious reasons why we do things, but we need to find the deeper meaning behind our actions.  Deeper thinking may allow us to change and improve.  Think about others, of course, but also think about your life now and in the future.  Keep your mind thoughtful.