Time

   
     Every new year, every birthday, even every day can be a new beginning.
     First, appreciate the present, the way things are now, the way you look, the way you feel, and the way you think.  Count your blessings and feel contentment.
     Second, be proud of your past, but don't idealize it and wish to turn back the clock.  Learn from your experiences.  If need be, forgive yourself and others.
     Third, plan your future.  Set realistic goals, keep optimistic, and go for it.  Save plenty of time for yourself to rest, relax, read a book, watch TV, and rejuvenate.  Many obstacles can get in the way of your plans like health problems, loss of loved ones, and occasionally depression, but realize that with the passage of time, wisdom will come.
     I'm sure you have heard, "Today is the first day of the rest of your life, but live it like it might be your last."  As best as you can, try to improve your own life and the lives of those around you.  Enjoy the time you have. 
     Happy New Year!

Reconnect

    
     Some people do it with Christmas cards and annual letters often including updated family photos.  Some reconnect with an email or a  phone call.  Whatever the method, someone is thinking of you and wants to stay connected even if only once a year.
     Disconnect can happen when we  move away from home, family, friends, and classmates.  Some families relocate many times leaving friends behind perhaps never to see again.  Disagreements and estrangements can also cause a disconnect.
     One wish I have for you this Christmas season is that you continue or resume contact one way or another with family and friends.  Show them that they are remembered and that you care and want to reconnect.

Scan and Update

Scan what comes into your life.  What you see, hear, read, and experience can be a positive or negative influence to your thinking.
Edit what goes out into the world.  What you say, write, create, and do should be good  for you and others.
Reply and share to promote communication.
Empty the trash: prejudice, grudges, revenge, negativity, excessive stress.
Fill the calendar with goals and ways to accomplish them.
Update occasionally to get rid of what doesn't work and replace with improved thinking.

Adolescence

     We have all gone through adolescence, that period of growing up and becoming an adult which seems to be complete after the teenage years; however, a second adolescence can occur at a much older age.  Our bodies have been adult for many years, but our thinking continues to develop as we  experience the various stages of life.  Just like teenagers, we may go through questioning and even rebelling against the authorities in our lives.  We can evaluate all the influences of parents, peers, religion, politics, and society in general.  Maturity is not accomplished by just experiencing our teenage adolescence.
     As we get older, we often tire of thinking about alternate opinions and desire the comfort of having our minds made up about important issues.  We often realize that we may never have the answers to all of  the questions or understand the many mysteries of life.  Our opinions, however, are as important and valid as any others.  While valuing the thoughts of others, we need to value most our own unique grownup thoughts.

Act - Don't React

     Everyone has a good idea of how they want to behave based on their values and common sense; however, how we should act is sometimes derailed by reacting in a way that lowers our standards.  When some one's actions make us feel criticized or insulted, we need to first remember the person may just have another point of view, may not be thinking straight, or may be displaying exaggerated emotions.  This "bad" behavior from another person may make us defensive, and while trying to protect ourselves or show we disagree, we might react in a way that helps us let off steam but may actually cause a fight not even worthy of the original action.  Some people may feel the hurtful act deserves punishment in words or with the silent treatment.  This can just prolong and even exaggerate the situation.
     A better strategy may be just to take a deep relaxing breath, leave the room, compose yourself, and temporarily ignore the behavior.  This doesn't mean you are being a doormat but are just trying to postpone a reaction.  When tempers cool, the behavior in question can be discussed.  Don't let bad behavior from others cause you to behave in a similar or worse manner.  Don't react when it is better to act as your best self.  Remain grownup.